Feeling overwhelmed is a common experience in today’s fast-paced world! Many of us are juggling multiple responsibilities, from work demands to personal commitments, often leading to the sensation of being swamped by unfinished tasks. If you find yourself struggling to manage these pressures, you’re certainly not alone. Below are some of the most effective strategies, straight from the therapy room, to help you regain control and reduce feelings of overwhelm.
Understanding Overwhelm
Overwhelm often arises when we perceive our tasks as equally urgent and important, clouding our ability to prioritise effectively. This sensation can lead to paralysis where, despite being busy, productivity stalls, and stress levels skyrocket. Ever needed to do something and spent the last hour doing everything but… yep, that’s paralysis! Recognising the triggers and symptoms of overwhelm is the first step towards tackling it. These triggers might include a high workload, personal life demands, or emotional stressors such as anxiety or depression, which compound the feeling of being unable to cope. The symptoms may be physical, such as headaches, upset stomach, and difficulty sleeping soundly.
According to Mel Robbins, there are two types of overwhelm: legitimate and lifestyle. Legitimate overwhelm includes things like work commitments, caring responsibilities for a child or parent, grief, or life events (moving house, illness, etc.). We can’t necessarily ‘get rid’ of these, but we can manage as best we can by practising self-compassion and using the tools as best we can that are coming up. Lifestyle overwhelm includes things we think are really important—like getting the shopping done, posting the birthday card, or calling the bank. The brain lies to us, telling us they are important, but in reality, they’re not, and they end up feeling overwhelming. So, what can we do?
Tool 1: The Brain Dump
A potent method to combat overwhelm is the “brain dump.” This technique involves taking a moment to write down everything on your mind related to tasks and responsibilities. Here’s how you can effectively perform a brain dump:
Set a Quiet Time: Allocate a specific time in a quiet setting where you can focus without interruptions.
List Everything: Write down all tasks, big and small, that are occupying your mind. This includes emails you need to respond to, appointments, personal errands, and anything else you need to address.
Organise and Prioritise: Once everything is on paper, start organising it into categories and prioritise based on urgency and importance. Use a highlighter or a different colour pen and identify what needs immediate attention, what can be scheduled later, and what can be delegated or eliminated.
By visually laying out your responsibilities, you can better manage them and plan strategically. This tool not only clears your mind but also makes the tasks appear more manageable.
Tool 2: Partnered Review
Sometimes, having an objective third party can significantly help in managing overwhelm. This can be a friend, family member, or a colleague. Here’s how you can use this strategy:
Share Your List: Sometimes just explaining your list to another person can help you see things from a different perspective.
Ask for Input: Let them help you identify priorities and suggest ways to tackle each task.
Immediate Actions: If there are any tasks that can be completed quickly (e.g., sending an email or making a phone call), do them immediately during this session.
This method helps by introducing an external viewpoint which can often be more rational and less emotionally driven.
Tool 3: Setting Priorities with the Eisenhower Box
The Eisenhower Box, also known as the Urgent-Important Matrix, is a fantastic tool for sorting tasks by urgency and importance, helping to prioritise effectively. Here’s how to apply it:
Draw the Matrix: Create a box divided into four quadrants labelled “Urgent and Important,” “Important but Not Urgent,” “Urgent but Not Important,” and “Neither Urgent nor Important.”
Assign Tasks: Place each task from your brain dump into one of these quadrants.
Action Steps: Focus on completing tasks in the “Urgent and Important” quadrant first. Schedule tasks in the “Important but Not Urgent” quadrant, delegate “Urgent but Not Important” tasks if possible, and consider dropping tasks that fit into the “Neither Urgent nor Important” quadrant.
Using this matrix can dramatically enhance your task management by clarifying what needs your attention most urgently.
Tool 4: Embrace the Power of ‘No’
Part of feeling overwhelmed comes from overcommitting. Learning to say ‘no’ or not now to tasks that do not align with your immediate goals or that contribute to your stress can be transformative. This doesn’t mean shirking responsibilities but rather taking on new obligations only when you can realistically manage them without sacrificing your mental health. We know that saying ‘no’ is easier said than done especially if you are a people pleaser, but practice makes perfect. Start small; say no to a chore in the house, or your child asking for a second pudding, something that feels safe. Once you get use to this move onto maybe friends or work. It will get easier. Observe the feelings that follow as guilt and unease may follow. Be curious – what is it you actually feel guilty about? (Remember putting yourself first is not selfish!)
Implementing Self-care
Finally, integrating self-care into your routine can greatly reduce feelings of overwhelm. Whether it’s taking short breaks during the day, practising mindfulness, or simply ensuring you have quiet time to decompress, self-care is crucial. These practices not only help in reducing stress but also in improving overall productivity and satisfaction. Again start small do something for 5 minutes that is just for you. When this feels ok, increase the time you spend on you.
Regular Check-ins
Incorporate regular check-ins with yourself to assess your mental and physical well-being. This could mean setting aside time each week to reflect on what’s working and what isn’t, adjusting your strategies accordingly. It’s also a great opportunity to celebrate small victories, which can be highly motivating in periods of stress.
Conclusion
Feeling overwhelmed isn’t just about having too much to do; it’s about not knowing where to start. By employing techniques like the brain dump, using the Eisenhower Box, involving a third party for clarity, learning to say ‘no,’ practising regular self-care, and scheduling check-ins, you can navigate through your tasks more effectively giving you head space and clarity
For more of a chat on feeling overwhelmed get in contact
Listen to Mel Robbins podcast on feeling overwhelmed
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